Post by ballistica on Dec 27, 2008 3:15:27 GMT 8
Well, I posted a long time ago on a quote by C.S. Lewis about Love. And so, a week ago, I finally bought the book, 'The Four Loves' brilliantly written by him. I am still in the midst of reading, have finished reading on 'Likings and Love for the Sub-human' and 'Affection'. Two more loves to go. Anyways, here's just some pondering and personal perspectives after reading these two Loves...
"The human mind is generally far more eager to praise and dispraise than to describe and define. It wants to make every distinction a distinction of value; hence those fatal critics who can never point out the differing quality of two poets without putting them in an order of preference as if they were candidates for a price. We must do nothing of the sort about the pleasures. The reality is too complicated. We are already warned of this by the fact that Need-pleasure is the state in which Appreciative pleasures end up when they go bad (by addiction)."
I guess C.S. Lewis meant that we are far quick to judge even before we savour, which in turn does corrupt our enjoyment of situations and things that we are involved in. I guess we can make an interesting parallel to work and performances that we are most often being graded by. I guess this is the reason why my teacher is always trying to tell me that grades don't really matter as much as the music I make. In that sense, I do see some link and relation to my pursue of passion for music. Also, something just came to me that if it is the feeling or 'kick' that we thirst after, then we are chasing love, or things or desires or dreams or ambitions or whatever it can be, for the wrong reasons. Thus, we must be clear of what we are chasing after, and what we stand rooted, and what we draw from the source in order to rekindle the burning flames of passion within or the water from the spring to quench our thirst, which brings me to the next quote...
"Affection produces happiness if - only if - there is common sense and give and take and "decency." In other words, only if something more, and other, than Affection is added. The mere feeling is not enough. You need "Common sense," that is, reason. You need "give and take"; that is, you need justice, continually stimulating mere Affection when it fades and restraining it when it forgets or would defy the art of love. You need "decency." There is no disguising the fact that this means goodness; patience, self-denial, humility, and the continual intervention of a far higher sort of love than Affection, in itself, can even be. That is the whole point. If we try to live by Affection alone, Affection will "go bad on us.""
Thus if it (any thing aspect or situation, such as love, or music) is based on feeling alone wouldn't be sufficient. There needs to be reasoning to a certain extent (some form of questioning or reason perhaps of why you love something, the purpose behind it), "give and take"; where love is sacrificial (I am sure I do not need to elaborate on this as we see it in the daily lives on the love that our parents shower us with), and "decency" as how it is explained on the section above is pretty straight forward and I love the way of how it is elaborated and the choices of words fitted into describing it. Also, the final point about how there has to be a higher sort of Affection, I am still trying to grasp this thought but I would guess that includes loves like friendship and the other loves that I'll probably am going to read about in this book. This is very true in a particular personal perspective that I stand for. And that is a love relationship is a higher form of manifestation of a close and good knitted friendship. Without it, it would be like building castles in the air, and just like how C.S. Lewis puts it, "If we try to live by Affection alone, Affection will "go bad on us."" This is evident that there are stages (although never to be clearly defined or stated) to go through before moving on to the next, which in turn reminds me of how a flower bud is forced to bloom prematurely, just like it, the love that we deemed as would soon wither swiftly before our very eyes.
Song of Solomon 2:7
"Do not stir up nor awaken love until it pleases"
Just like how Jo has quoted quite a while back.
CS Lewis, The Four Loves (San Diego: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1960)
"The human mind is generally far more eager to praise and dispraise than to describe and define. It wants to make every distinction a distinction of value; hence those fatal critics who can never point out the differing quality of two poets without putting them in an order of preference as if they were candidates for a price. We must do nothing of the sort about the pleasures. The reality is too complicated. We are already warned of this by the fact that Need-pleasure is the state in which Appreciative pleasures end up when they go bad (by addiction)."
I guess C.S. Lewis meant that we are far quick to judge even before we savour, which in turn does corrupt our enjoyment of situations and things that we are involved in. I guess we can make an interesting parallel to work and performances that we are most often being graded by. I guess this is the reason why my teacher is always trying to tell me that grades don't really matter as much as the music I make. In that sense, I do see some link and relation to my pursue of passion for music. Also, something just came to me that if it is the feeling or 'kick' that we thirst after, then we are chasing love, or things or desires or dreams or ambitions or whatever it can be, for the wrong reasons. Thus, we must be clear of what we are chasing after, and what we stand rooted, and what we draw from the source in order to rekindle the burning flames of passion within or the water from the spring to quench our thirst, which brings me to the next quote...
"Affection produces happiness if - only if - there is common sense and give and take and "decency." In other words, only if something more, and other, than Affection is added. The mere feeling is not enough. You need "Common sense," that is, reason. You need "give and take"; that is, you need justice, continually stimulating mere Affection when it fades and restraining it when it forgets or would defy the art of love. You need "decency." There is no disguising the fact that this means goodness; patience, self-denial, humility, and the continual intervention of a far higher sort of love than Affection, in itself, can even be. That is the whole point. If we try to live by Affection alone, Affection will "go bad on us.""
Thus if it (any thing aspect or situation, such as love, or music) is based on feeling alone wouldn't be sufficient. There needs to be reasoning to a certain extent (some form of questioning or reason perhaps of why you love something, the purpose behind it), "give and take"; where love is sacrificial (I am sure I do not need to elaborate on this as we see it in the daily lives on the love that our parents shower us with), and "decency" as how it is explained on the section above is pretty straight forward and I love the way of how it is elaborated and the choices of words fitted into describing it. Also, the final point about how there has to be a higher sort of Affection, I am still trying to grasp this thought but I would guess that includes loves like friendship and the other loves that I'll probably am going to read about in this book. This is very true in a particular personal perspective that I stand for. And that is a love relationship is a higher form of manifestation of a close and good knitted friendship. Without it, it would be like building castles in the air, and just like how C.S. Lewis puts it, "If we try to live by Affection alone, Affection will "go bad on us."" This is evident that there are stages (although never to be clearly defined or stated) to go through before moving on to the next, which in turn reminds me of how a flower bud is forced to bloom prematurely, just like it, the love that we deemed as would soon wither swiftly before our very eyes.
Song of Solomon 2:7
"Do not stir up nor awaken love until it pleases"
Just like how Jo has quoted quite a while back.
CS Lewis, The Four Loves (San Diego: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1960)